TDP Episode 91 photoEpisode 91: Lying, by host, Laura Milkins. Our guest, Neil, tells the story of his depression, along with anxiety, PTSD, and bipolar diagnosis, and how seeking help in the midst of mental and physical heath issues requires persistence and the ability to navigate the systems of government. Sunday, August 26, 2018

The Lies We Tell When We Are Depressed
September 19, 2013 • Contributed by Cynthia W. Lubow, MS, MFT


Even the most honest people are faced with lying when they are depressed. This is yet another indignity adding to the suffering of depression. The most obvious and pervasive example is the frequent, daily question, “How are you?” It is a social convention to greet friends, strangers, and acquaintances with this question. Frankly, most of us lie in response to this question, or at least shade or limit the truth, because people generally don’t want to hear the true answer when they ask. Convention tells us to answer, “I’m fine, thanks; how are you?” For most people most of the time, this isn’t a big deal. It’s just a formality that facilitates greeting people, and is understood as a friendly hello. It’s not generally a problem because mostly people are fine, and don’t need to tell someone about the rash on their butt or the dog poo they stepped in.

But for a depressed person, the lies required for social convention are constant, and they create more and more isolation and separateness from other people. They reinforce a sense of having a shameful secret that no one wants to know or help them resolve. It reinforces a sense of being a burden or unlovable. All of these thoughts are common in depression, and to have them reinforced all day long by multiple people is crushing. Many people deal with it by isolating themselves from others if they can.

This is one of the most important reasons to find an experienced, qualified depression therapist when depression lasts longer than a few weeks. It’s essential to be able to tell someone the whole truth about how much you’re suffering, without concern that the person will discount you, disbelieve, judge, get distracted by fear about what you are saying, or respond with boredom, irritation, or impatience. As obvious as that may sound, not many people can do this for others.




TDP Episode 90 photoEpisode 90: Art, by host, Laura Milkins. Our guest, Kenneth Weene, tells the story of depression/not depression from his book, “Jumping Over the Ram”, which he co-authored with Deng, a Sudanese man who had to repress his softer feelings to survive life as a child soldier and escaping to a refugee camp. Sunday, August 12, 2018

For more information on Kenneth Weene, his books and his councilling practice:

Website is
Amazon page is
Phone number is (602) 300-1830
His newest books, not yet released, are “Jumping Over the Ram” and “Red and White”.

Excerpts read on the show:

Artists and Depression: The Link Between Depression and Creativity

Where there is depression, art often seems to follow—sometimes great art. Poe, Pollock, Michelangelo, Hemingway, Keats, Gauguin, Dickens and Blake are just a few famous creative artists who are known to have suffered from terrible bouts of depression.

But how exactly do depression and art interrelate? Do depressive episodes somehow aid in the creative process, or is there something about being an artist in any creative field that predisposes one to develop depression? Psychologists and psychiatrists have studied and pondered this question for decades, and most have concluded that depression does play a role in creative output.

Creative people can become chronically frustrated because their idealism and reflective natures make it impossible for them to accept their own failures or those of society. Others without such a creative inclination may be saddened in the moment. But they’ll be far less likely to tie themselves up in knots imagining and re-imagining alternative histories that could have happened but didn’t, or should happen but never will.

Depression can be a debilitating condition, but often it is a warning sign and a cry for help. In other words, it calls for action, and those with great artistic ability naturally turn to their art to express what they’re feeling. Their depression may not be the cause of their art, but it can be a motivation for it, or a coping mechanism for it. That helps explain why so many creative people burdened with depression have managed to maintain such an impressive output of creative works.

When used to treat depression, art therapy functions as an outlet for expressing feelings that aren’t easy to put into words, or that are so repressed or hidden that they can only be revealed through the free and open channels of the creative process. Artistic practice of all types takes the artist deeper into their own subconscious, where the answers to the mysteries of mental illness are more likely to be found.

“In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer.” -Albert Camus